I knew years ago that I was supposed to write. I started writing poetry as a teenager, and continued into college. As an undergraduate junior, I realized that I was destined to one day author books. I knew this within in my soul, but my mind couldn’t quite reconcile it with my other interests and endeavors. I was a Biology turned Exercise Science major and I thought that I was headed to medical school–until I realized that it was an endeavor I took on to please my father and make him proud. I wanted to turn all of his suffering and shame into honor–and I was willing to do it at my expense.
But not too long after I’d realized that medical school is not what I truly wanted, and before I could truly reflect on exactly what it was that I wanted, I was in love and pregnant with my first child. Go figure. College graduate turned homemaker, I became miserable, depressed, and unsure of what the future held for me. I was gasping for air and crying out to God for help. Where was my life headed? How did I get here?
I would be restless at night, while my girls and their father were sound asleep, looking up graduate programs in college, attempting to grasp hold of my writing again through a failed attempt of a blog, and just searching…searching for more.
I always knew that there was so much more inside that I had to give. I always knew that there was something powerful inside that I needed go give and share with the world. I just didn’t know how I’d do it. Reflecting over my life, particularly what I’ve experienced in the last 12 years, everything is starting to make more sense now. I look forward to sharing my experiences, reflections, and thought processes through this blog. And by doing so, what I’ve been carrying all these years, that gift that was conceived so long ago, is about to be born; and I get to share what I’ve been carrying with the world. I get to dedicate and give it back to God by giving of myself and this gift through writing. I get to help, heal, and inspire others. I know that this is what I’m supposed to be doing, and the recent happenings have served as confirmation.
Since I’ve made up my mind to step out on my dreams–to take action and start this blog, I’ve been so distracted. Distracted by my home life, distracted by work, distracted by family and friends, by weird occurrences, etc. With consecutive visits from family and friends, little alone time from my girls recently, a lost debit card, new projects I’ve been asked to take on at work, and the list continues, my reflection time has been continuously stifled and/or eliminated. My prayer and meditation time have also been effected. This effects my ability to write and record my thoughts, feelings, and revelations.
Here is what I believe, there’s a force, or principality at work–a force that knows the power that I have–the power that I hold and can successfully wield by way of my fingertips. It’s the power to heal, the power to encourage, the power to liberate, the power to positively change people’s lives for good.
If we are not careful, even those things that seem to be harmless, and or good can distract us from what we’ve been divinely destined to do. What makes these types of distractions so dangerous is that they are disguised as “good,” or “harmless,” or “necessities.”
A great man of God once said, “There is a difference between a good thing to do, and a right thing to do. The good thing is good, but takes away time. The right thing always elevates you.” I have made up my mind to stop allowing myself to be distracted by “good” things so that I can consistently engage in the RIGHT things, which will always be fruitful and continue to propel me towards my purpose. People are waiting on me to walk in my purpose. Lives are counting on us (YOU and I) to remain focused, give birth to our gifts, give back, and share with the world.
Considering that this is a learned skill–learning to turn down what’s good for the sake of what’s right, I realize that this is not something that will happen over night. However, I am grateful to be awakened to this newfound “truth.” The awakening makes the ability to change possible.
What are you engaging in–the good things to do, or the RIGHT thing to do?
1 Corinthians 7:35 “Now I say this for your won benefit; not to restrict you, but to promote what is appropriate and secure undistracted devotion to the Lord.”
Mark 4:19 “But all too quickly the message is crowded out by the worries of this life, the lure of wealth, and the desire for other things, so no fruit is produced.”