Pushed Towards Purpose

God is so amazing.   He definitely knows what we need better than we do.   He knows us better than we know ourselves.  He is our creator.  He designed each and every one of us and knows every intricate detail that makes us who we are.  It is absolutely amazing to become aware of this truth as I watch His hand in my own life.

I will never forget one of the fist times I heard God speak to me.  This particular time, he was responding to me about an issue that I was frustrated and talking to him about.  He told me that He’d called me to be great!  But first, He had to rid me of some things.   Here I am, 15 years later, and I see that He’s truly ridding me of some things.  I feel the “greatness” that He spoke of rising up in me.  I feel the shift taking place.  I’m receiving revelation about self like never before.  Today, I want to address some recent insight that the Holy Spirit has revealed about myself.

I always knew that I wanted to be a homeowner someday.  But I wasn’t looking to become one anytime soon.  I had a lot of fear around owning a home.  Lack of knowledge about purchasing, maintaining, and increasing its value, fear of not being able to afford all that all that is necessary to maintain a home, and fear that I would ultimately fail at being a homeowner; and that the home that I purchased would decline in value.

Every little thing that happened sent me to that place of fear—a smudge on the wall, a crack in the driveway pavement, peeling paint, spider eggs around the outdoor light fixtures, a broken shower door handle.  Everything that happened would send me back to that childhood place where I experienced a time period of living in my great grandparents run down, smelly, unkept home with no plumbing.  Every loose screw, hand print on the wall, even the smallest spill on the carpet would send me to a place from my childhood when more people lived in a house than it was designed for, a place that was rarely ever clean and comfortable.

I’ve realized that there was a part of me that didn’t believe that home ownership is my portion.  The fears that I have surrounding homeownership have been holding me hostage.  In order to operate in the greatness that God spoke upon me, I have to be free of the bondage of those fears.  I cannot operate in a place of greatness with an impoverished mindset.  I cannot thrive in a place of elevation if I don’t believe I belong there.

If God had not given me this home, I would not have learned this lesson.  I would not have received this revelation.  God is giving me revelation on a smaller scale so that I can train and prepare in this place in preparation for my next place.  I can now embrace homeownership because I recognize the purpose for homeownership in this season.  It wasn’t simply for the purpose of God giving it to me because He loves me—even though he does and would do so if He wanted to.  However, it is to help me to overcome my fear of success.  I used to ask the question, “How can people fear success?”  I realize, through my own personal experience, that my fear of success comes from a belief that I am not capable of success–that I will fail at succeeding—like I feared being a successful homeowner.

I release the fear of failure and I take on Faith and courage.  Success is my portion.  Prosperity is my portion.  Greatness is my portion.  I belong in a place of elevation—in a place in which I thrive in every mentionable aspect of my life—mentally, emotionally, physically, financially, spiritually, etc.

God is remaining true to His word that He gave me so many years ago.  He’s moving me toward greatness.  While doing so, He’s shifting so many things around in my life, revealing even more, and transforming my mind in the process.

I now know more than ever that God’s intentions are to elevate me.  I’ve learned to look at the things that He does in my life—especially those unexpected things that I didn’t quite ask for, or think that I was ready for.  Those very things serve a greater purpose than natural pleasures and enjoyment.  There’s a lesson to be learned in those things.  It is my job to keep my eyes, ears, heart, and mind open and ready for the lesson.

It’s amazing how quiet God seems at times–like music that plays on a radio whose volume has been completely turned down.  Then, when the volume is turned up on His voice, you realize that the song has been playing all along.  The difference is that now you can sing along.

Thank you, Jesus, for being a never ending song in my life.  I ask that you continue to provide revelation and purpose so that I can be on one accord and sing along with you. Hallelujah!

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